Decisions, decisions...

I'm back and not going private...right now.  I am not a good decision maker people so don't judge me!!!  I know most of my ramblings only benefit me but maybe, just maybe every now and then I share an idea that may help someone.  We watched Marley and Me the other night for Family Home Evening (a weak family home evening I know...) and it helped me make my final decision on what to do with this whole blogging thing.  At the end when they are having to put Marley to sleep (and I bawled like a baby because it reminded me of putting my Emily to sleep...like a 5 tissue cry feast...) the oldest son is looking back over his dads newspaper column and it comforts him...Maybe my blog can end up being that way for my family at some point.  Maybe it can be that for someone else who is going through struggles that I have been through and they can see that we made it to the other side and got through it.  Or maybe it will just be a bunch of ramblings and pictures of all the people I love...Either way I am okay with it and ready to roll again.  Just from taking this past week off my brain is all cluttered up with information I need to get out so those few of you who actually read this are stuck with me. :) 

What exactly am I doing here?...

In the blog world I mean.  I know what I am actually doing here in this whole thing called life.  I know I have a purpose.  But do I in the blog world?  This is supposed to be my journal of sorts but I rarely ever write anything.  I mean really write anything.  I used to but now I am usually just playing catch up on the whole "scrapbook" side of my blog.  Then I got to thinking is that part of my life that I really want out there?  I really started thinking about it about the middle of January (give or take a few days I can't remember exactly) when I had a comment from someone asking me to email them about my blog.  I took a while but I finally did and it was from someone starting a blog that wanted to reach more people (I have yet to check out her blog but I am going to.  I NEED to check it out!!! I haven't forgotten you I promise...) and she thought the "audience" (I use that term loosely because lets face it you either read this because you are a family member or because I think you rock and stalk your blog enough that you feel the need to know who this crazy person is who won't stop commenting on your blog...) my blog has would fit with hers perfectly and asked if she could guest post-which I am not opposed to I just..don't know what!!!  She wanted to get the word out.  She has has some struggles and wants to see if there is anyone out there that she can reach out to and say hey I've been there and I survived and you will too. That is a good thing and why not be a part of it?  I was going to respond but then I got scared and all self conscious.  What does my blog do besides take up a little room out there in cyberspace?...I feel strongly about a lot of things but I don't know that I really share them much.

So, I have been thinking and thinking about what I am really doing here in the blog world.  I started off just putting my little life down so I won't forget all those things I think I will never forget but do...Then I started to...I don't know feel the need for people to read it, but not really...Does that make sense?  There was a little while when I really did care if there were comments and hoped that more people were reading what I had to say, even though what I have to say doesn't amount to anything more than the ramblings that are tumbling around in my head.  Then I started the "here are pictures of my life with a little info to go along because I want to freeze time on all these memories and pretend my child isn't growing up so fast" phase on my blog and if you have been here for any length of time you know I take a lot of pictures....

Then I went into the posting just to post because I have started this and I don't feel like I should be a quitter at this too...especially since this is just supposed to be my journal/scrapbook/place to vent and declutter my brain!  And now I am here...wondering what to do next.  Is this a blog where people guest post?  I don't really know.  I have guest posted on one of my favorite blogs and it was an honor!  Not so sure my blog falls into the category of feeling honored to be featured on it &  I don't think it would really amp up anyone's blog stats if they did.

And I looked the other day at what people where searching for when they came to my blog and this is what popped up: "what I really do meme" (huh?), "sprained ankle mountain biking" (ok...?), "floating egg in salt water" (that was a homeschool science project..or should I say that was lots of pictures of my child doing a project...), pinterest ideas (that is sad...do I really talk about Pinterest that much?), and some other school project searches.  This is actually a good week!  I have had some strange things come up... Awesome.  I am really making a difference out there.

I also thought about the fact that my extended family, that I include on my blog on a regular basis (using their 1st names and everything!), never even were given the option to be put out there for whoever wants to read my blog!!!  My sister has a private blog that she uses nicknames for her kiddos on and I post pictures and say their names and it never even crossed my mind to make sure that was okay before doing it!  Add into all this confusion that 1 blog I follow has gone private (because she is going to make her blog more like a scrapbook...exactly what mine is supposed to be so should I go private????  This was already on my mind and now it is even more!!!).  Another one of my favorite blogs (Welcome to the Madness) thought about going private too.  She threw the idea out there and we talked her out of it because she is an awesome gardener, homeschooling mom, homemaker, and person in general and we NEED her great ideas and inspiration!  I don't really have any information I am offering besides what I am doing or have done on any given day and lets face it it isn't much compared to all the super moms out there....

So...need to think about this for a while....No comments on this one.  Just letting you know why my blog may or may not be out there whenever I do figure it all out!

(Just to warn you I just sit down and type...don't judge me if it doesn't make any sense or I used poor grammar...)

I love this post...

I found this picture on Pinterest and I kind of  fell in love with it!

I read this post over at Chocolate on my Cranium and loved it too.  If you believe in the sanctity of marriage you MUST go read it. You will not believe how the definition alone of marriage has changed. The world is changing people and we have to be ready to support what we know to be true....READ IT!  You will thank me for it later....

Brain Declutter: Because my cranium is crowded...

*Look at me posting 4 times in one week!  Well tons of pictures of Sadie may not actually count but Jake was excited to celebrate her adoption day.

*Speaking of adoption.  That is #9 on the list.  Do you remember the list?  We are officially  putting it out there: We are looking seriously into adoption!!!!  That is a weird way to say it...I mean we are going to try to adopt!  I can't even say it right...We are hoping someone will eventually pick us to adopt their baby!...It is so exciting but a strange mix of emotions too...I thought it would be easy.  Decide we want to do it after praying and agonizing and thinking and doing it all over again.... Check! Do some research. Check! Talk with a friend who has done it through LDS Family Services like we are going to. Check! Take the first official step to get the ball rolling. Ch---WHY IS IT SO HARD?  I wish I could explain the feelings it causes but stalling for whatever reason is one of them and being terrified is another.  Luckily the friend who has been through this said they went through it too and it is normal...That makes me feel better.  So now that I am putting it out there on my blog I am taking a baby step into releasing and letting go of the insecurities and nervousness that taking the first step seems to bring...And now that you know we have to tell Jake before you do so that means we have to get the ball rolling since he will ask us about it every day...AHHHH!!!!

*I am starting the couch to 5k program Monday with Jake. And restarting Weight Watchers. I can do this.  I will do this.

*I love the library.  It makes me happy.  We filled up a big bag of books there today...I am getting ready to re-read (I read most of them when I was a kiddo...And I am going to add them to my list of books I am reading this year.  I said I was just going to read new books but I lied. :) )

*We spent the day looking at houses in SC again.  I should have been a real estate agent because I could look at houses all day long!  It is so fun.

*Funny that Jake just asked me the other day if when you adopt a baby "do you have to pay for it?". Random and out of the blue...To which I said yes and he thought that was pretty, in his words, stupid.  I told him why it wasn't stupid and he understood but still thought it was shall we say not so smart.  A few weeks ago he said something about the "Adoption Store". He has either over heard us...I don't think he has.  Or he is on the same "wave length" we are. :) Either way he will know really soon...

*I am getting used to typing on Aaron's lap top with the flat keys.  I used to hate it, but now not so much.

*For humanities, one of my nieces had to ask people in different age groups to answer this question: "A government is making its citizens good if the citizens are...." and you complete the sentence.  Do you want to know what Jake said?  It made me a little sick to my stomach..and I may have thrown up a little in my mouth.  He said: "doing what the government says."  What?....Come again?...We have a little something to study.  We talk about the Constitution.  We are studying the Presidents right now as a matter of fact and have been talking about how the founding fathers worked so hard to make sure the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution were amazing documents that laid the path for this great nation and the amazing freedoms we have.  We are talking about how the Constitution talks about the roles of each branch of the government and how we know feel very strongly some people in government (who shall remain nameless...) are over stepping the boundaries that the constitution clearly lays out for the power each branch is supposed to have...And that is how he finishes that sentence....Back to the drawing board and TOMORROW we are going to revisit the question.  I just finished reading a book about Thomas Jefferson (I need to add it to my list of new books I am reading in 2012!) that I can pull some great quotes out of...How would you answer it?  Aaron's answer was short and sweet:  "...can choose their government."  He is a genius.  I said pretty much the same thing but it was a little more wordy.  Not surprising is it?

*I started this post 2 days ago, posted it, then got scared and took it down...It's back and I talked to Jake about the last one and he gets it.  We haven't talked to him about adoption yet...Maybe today...

These are a few of my favorite "things"....

I am going to try and do this every Thursday because there are just so many things that I love.  So, for this week I love:

1.) Chicken Doodle Soup.   We got it at Sam's Club (or Costco...I can't remember) a while ago and every now and then we pick it up and fall in love all over again. 

 Each page has a cute picture (today we did "foot long hot dog" (I didn't take a picture of it but it is a wiener dog in a bun with ketchup.), "BLT-Rex" (get it?), and "Salt and Leopard" (instead of pepper...you get it right?).  It tells you how to draw it step by step and it is so fun.  We all draw it right on the same sheet that is just the perfect size for a place mat-which is the whole point.  I thought about laminating them but lets face it dry erase markers don't compare to another one of my favorite things:  2.)Colored Pencils!

 Nee, Jake, and I all took one this morning, drew it, and then switched so we all did the same three.

 It even gives you cool little facts about the animal you are drawing.  Perfect for homeschooling!

 Mine came out looking more like an alligator so I named it "Gatorex".  That is part of what we do.  We name our animals.  :)

I love Jake's.  It looks like he didn't like his first couple of tails so he erased them.  To me it makes it look like he is wagging his tail. :)

We picked on Nee for naming her t-rex "Tee Tee".  :)  (She didn't think about the fact that some little kids say tee-tee when they have to go to the bathroom.)

3.) Books from the "juvenile" section of the library about the founding fathers.Why are they so much better than adult books?  I guess because they are quick reads, straight to the point, and easy to understand.  I have a whole stack (that I need to renew because I haven't been reading as much as I should lately...) that I am excited to read.  I just finished:  Thomas Jefferson, Architect of Freedom by Rita Thievon Mullin and I loved it.  Thomas Jefferson was a pretty amazing guy.

What "things" are you loving this week?

Sadie a year later...

This is what Sadie looked like one year ago today when brought her home....

She was one happy camper that we had adopted her into our dog spoiling family. :)

Here she is now...Love this sweet dog.  She is a little bit crazy but we wouldn't have it any other way.  We are so glad she is a part of our family and have loved every (well that may be an exaggeration...j/k) minute of it!  I went a little over board when I was looking at pictures of her but I can do that because it is my blog right?  Enjoy, in very random order, the ton of pictures I just couldn't resist posting on the anniversary of her adoption.  These pictures tell a story about the best friend she is to Jake and it makes me so happy.  If you haven't had a dog for a best friend you are really missing out. :)  Love you crazy dog Sadie!  Here is to many more years with you.....