I am going to try and make this quick (that is hard for me...) because I need to head to bed, but I knew if I didn't write it down now I would forget. So, here it is:
Jake got in trouble today because he made a bad choice (he stuck up for his best friend when someone hit him on the hand with a broom by kicking the "bully"...longer story than that but that is the gist of it) and I was
yelling at him telling him how I felt about that bad choice. He was upset (and let me add tired...not an excuse just a fact) so he cried and felt horrible. I wanted him to feel horrible because he shouldn't have done it...Just not that horrible...Okay back to making this short. When he was getting into bed, we talked and said individual prayers about what happened and cuddled. While I was praying, I asked Heavenly Father to let Jake know that no matter what he does we (myself and Heavenly Father...lots of other people too-and we talked about that also-but at the moment it was just us) will always be there for him. That he can always talk to us. I felt the Spirit come into my heart and after we were both done praying I told Jake what I prayed about and how I felt. He started crying and said that praying about it made him feel a little better and that he felt the Spirit too. Then he said, while hugging me around my neck and breaking my heart wide open: "I could never live with out you." I said I felt the same way. Then he said: "But some day I will have to." (I paused because he is right, he will have to live without me some day...Scary thought, for selfish reasons-I want to be here for everything in his whole life! Every second. Wow how does Heavenly Father let us do this whole mortality thing?!) To which I said: "But we will be together again and no matter how hard life can be you can always talk to Heavenly Father." I may have said more but my mind was still stuck on not wanting to miss any second of his life...Then he said (*tear*): "You always comfort me." If I was smart I would have said something like so can the Holy Ghost and used it as a teaching moment. Instead I just hugged him back and told him I loved him. All the eye rolling, the "do we have to do ____ (insert whatever topic we are about to move onto next while homeschooling...) now?", and sighing (all of which he gets from me...) went right out the window. It doesn't matter (it does but not as much) how good I am at teaching him math. It matters how I teach him to follow the Spirit. To pray for forgiveness, and turn to the Lord for peace. To feel remorse when you make a wrong choice and to know there will always be someone to help make it better. And that someone won't always be me...even though I
really want it to be...Heavenly Father
will always be there for Jake, even when I can't be....
Isn't it amazing that when you are taking a moment to teach your child what is really important, you realize you are the one that needed the lesson?
